Joy Ignites Success

Too Many Demands on Your Time?

By - Tuesday, September 03, 2013

Does Everybody Want Something From You?

Are you guilty of saying yes to everyone except your self?  Are you last on the priority list?  When you are more concerned about making others happy than taking care of you, you are putting both your health and relationships at risk. If not already, the overload will take a physical toll on you and eventually lead to resentment of others.  Here’s a two-step plan to shift out of the others first way of being in the world.

Part I- Putting Self Higher on the Priority List

1.    Make a list of all the areas in your life that you manage (this is fun to do on a mind-map)  (Visit

2.    Do an honest evaluation of your priorities

3.    Assess how much time you spent working, resting, playing, taking time for yourself

4.    Determine what an ideal ratio would be

5.    Journal or list what action steps you could take to achieve balance

6.    Commit to taking one small step in that direction

Part II- Say no more often

1.    Think about saying no in a situation where it feels challenging to do that.

2.    Notice what images come to mind, what sensations you might feel in your body, and any thoughts or beliefs about saying no (be willing to allow any uncomfortable memories to arise)

3.    Practice saying no in areas that are less uncomfortable and build up to the more difficult ones.

4.    Think of a friend who is really good at saying no and imagine being him or her in those tough situations.

5.    Play with saying the words yes, no, yes, no for as long as it takes to notice they are both just sounds.

6.    Imagine your inner child saying ‘no, no, no’ and stamping her feet and throwing a fit.

7.    Don’t look for excuses; just say no.  (the more you feel like you have to defend your no, the more it will feel wrong that you are saying it)

8.    Remember that you have now put yourself higher on the priority list and if you say “yes” to others, you are saying “no” to yourself.

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About MSI

Melanie Smithson Institute is dedicated to enriching lives through embodied education and training; using movement, play and releasing to connect with innate wisdom and joy.  

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