Joy Ignites Success

Use Feedback to Your Advantage - SP #19

By  - Friday, August 17, 2012

Success Principle #19- Use Feedback to Your Advantage

The Principle in a Nutshell: Feedback shows up verbally and non-verbally; use it constructively.   

Discussion: Whenever we attempt something new and share it with the world, we receive feedback.  Some positive, some negative, some verbal, some non-verbal.  What we do with that feedback makes a huge difference in how we continue.  If we accept all feedback from external sources, we risk cutting off from internal wisdom.  If we reject all external feedback, we risk getting lost in our own illusions.  Learning to be with feedback, trying it on for size and integrating what is helpful and letting go of what is not, is a skill that can serve us well.   Read More

Reject Rejection - SP #18

By  - Friday, August 03, 2012

Success Principle #18:  Reject Rejection

The Principle in a Nutshell: Recognize that the whole concept of rejection is in your head.

Discussion: This principle speaks to how we perceive other people’s responses to us and our requests or proposals.  It recognizes that a ‘no’ response is not a rejection of us.  How many times have you said no to cake or ice cream?  Is it because you don’t like cake or ice cream?  Do you think the cake takes it personally?  Do you think the ice cream will never try to entice you again?  Yes, I am personifying inanimate objects, but maybe we have something to learn from them.  The fifth way of releasing recognizes that there is really nothing personal or attached to us anyway.  So, the fact that someone says no to us, doesn’t have to have any meaning at all. Read More

Ask, Ask, Ask - SP #17

By  - Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Success Principle #17:  Ask, Ask, Ask

The Principle in a Nutshell: If you don’t ask, you don’t know.  Don’t assume you know what the answer will be.

Discussion: An often sited principle by Jack and his coaches, there is more to it than meets the eye.  From a therapist’s perspective, being willing to ask and risk rejection takes a strong sense of self.  But, it goes both ways- being willing to ask and risk rejection can build self-esteem.  We stop ourselves from asking for what we want because we think we know the answer, because we don’t want to be a bother or because we were taught that it was impolite to ask.   Read More

Be Willing to Pay the Price - SP #16

By  - Tuesday, July 10, 2012

Success Principle #16:  Be Willing to Pay the Price

The Principle in a Nutshell: Success doesn’t come without putting in the work.  

Discussion: I think this is a principle worth looking at from a few different angles.  The examples Jack Canfield sites in his book are from sports and music, where practice can fine tune and develop ability. Hale Dwoskin might respond to this principle with a comment like this- ‘unless it does’.  I think that putting in the work  (or paying the price) may be releasing and getting the limitations out of the way.  To me, the key point in this principle is the word willing.  How willing are you to take action if necessary, release when appropriate and stick to it when you feel like giving up? Read More

Defending, Justifying and Explaining

By  - Friday, June 22, 2012

Defending, Justifying and Explaining

Do you have a habit of wanting to explain yourself or your actions?  Do you defend and justify everything you do to others or even to yourself?  If you do, you are definitely not alone.  The tendency to want to defend our behaviors, thoughts and feelings is rampant in our society and often comes from wanting approval or security.  We think if someone understands why we did what we did, they won’t be mad at us, or they will ‘get us’.  The justifying and explaining could also be coming from wanting to control their reactions or opinions, or from wanting to be the same as them (oneness) or wanting to be different from them (separation).  The problem with all the explaining and defending, is that it creates a feeling that we did something wrong, even if we didn’t originally feel that way. Read More

Experience Your Fear and Take Action Anyway - SP #15

By  - Tuesday, April 10, 2012

Success Principle #15:  Experience Your Fear and Take Action Anyway

The Principle in a Nutshell: Don’t let fear stop you.  

Discussion: Underlying almost every reason, excuse or explanation for not doing what you need to do to get to where you want to go is fear.  Fear of looking foolish, fear of failing, fear of succeeding (yup, we have that fear too) and so much more.  When we feel our feelings (not conquer them), they move through awareness without a lot of effort.  When we resist the feelings, they hang around and create havoc.  I have seen many, many clients over the years resist feeling sadness, fear, anger, grief and more because they are afraid they will get stuck in the feeling and be overwhelmed or immobilized by it.  Nothing is further from the truth.  When we don’t allow ourselves to feel or experience our emotions, they simply hang around lurking under the surface.  
As an acronym, FEAR has been defined as false evidence appearing real.  Many of the things we fear are not based in reality.   Read More

Just Lean Into It - SP #14

By  - Friday, March 02, 2012

Success Principle #14:  Just Lean Into It

The Principle in a Nutshell: Start moving in the direction you want to be heading.

Discussion: I really like this principle.  Perhaps because it’s so body-oriented.  When we lean with the body, we get pulled in that direction (unless of course, something or someone pushes us back).  I believe the same principles apply across the board, that leaning into something we want gives us momentum towards exploring and having that.  I am personally living this principle right now.  I am venturing more into the world of coaching small business owners and offering teleconferences.  And, even though I don’t know what I’m doing (not the content part, the marketing and technical parts); I am taking steps in that direction.  I have scheduled a couple of free conferences and am starting to see myself doing coaching for executives and business owners.  It’s important to know that you don’t have to have the big picture and all the answers to lean into something you are passionate about. Read More

What? You're Going to Another Workshop?

By  - Friday, February 24, 2012

What?  You’re Going to Another Workshop?

Do these title words sound familiar to you?  Or do your friends and family just sigh and hope you find your way?  Well, maybe it’s because you know something that others might be missing.    

I have been attending workshops, seminars and classes for self-improvement and spiritual growth for over 30 years.  And not just on occasion.  Some might call me a workshop junkie.  And they would be right.  Given spare time and money I would likely find myself in many more workshops and seminars.  I’ve been fortunate that most of the workshops I have attended have been transformative and motivating, with the occasional exception.  I laugh at the facilitators who claim ‘this will be the last seminar you’ll ever attend’.  As a general rule, I love the format and intensity of seminars and workshops, and will probably continue attending them for a long time, even if I have improved myself beyond recognition. Read More

Take Action - SP #13

By  - Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Success Principle #13:  Take Action

The Principle in a Nutshell: Do something!  The universe rewards action.

Discussion: This is one of the simplest principles to understand, yet still demands exploring.  As I see it, there is a great divide between many goal-oriented and success programs and spiritual programs, where there needn’t be.  Sometimes on a spiritual path we can go into magical thinking and expect the world to open up for us because we have meditated or visualized.  On the other path of success and goal-oriented seminars, we can push too hard and think we are the only factor in what happens.  In between, there is a path of taking action and letting go.  Of doing, what Bernardo Monserrat, of CRS in Santa Fe, says is our 10% (the universe or God being the 90%).  In my experience, we don’t even have to figure out the right action, we just have to let the universe know that we’re in.  We do this by taking action. Read More

Act As If - SP #12

By  - Tuesday, February 07, 2012

Success Principle #12:  Act As If

The Principle in a Nutshell: Start acting right now as you would when the goal is achieved.  

Discussion: There are many things we can do now that will put the gears in motion for being where we want to be.  We can change our clothes, our attitude, our business cards, our websites and more to reflect the changes we want in our lives.  For health and relationship goals, this may take a little more creative thought, but acting as if sends a clear message to the universe and reprograms our brain.    
When we act as if, it is possible it will bring up some feelings of grief, anger or lust about not already having it.  The following release is designed to help you let go of those feelings. Read More

About MSI

Melanie Smithson Institute is dedicated to enriching lives through embodied education and training; using movement, play and releasing to connect with innate wisdom and joy.  

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