Joy Ignites Success

Ask, Ask, Ask - SP #17

By - Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Success Principle #17:  Ask, Ask, Ask

The Principle in a Nutshell: If you don’t ask, you don’t know.  Don’t assume you know what the answer will be.

Discussion: An often sited principle by Jack and his coaches, there is more to it than meets the eye.  From a therapist’s perspective, being willing to ask and risk rejection takes a strong sense of self.  But, it goes both ways- being willing to ask and risk rejection can build self-esteem.  We stop ourselves from asking for what we want because we think we know the answer, because we don’t want to be a bother or because we were taught that it was impolite to ask.  


Sedona Method Release:

Think about your history with asking for what you want.  What memories come to mind?  Were you frequently told no as a child?  Or, even, were you told to shut up?  Allow yourself to review your experiences with asking for what you want, welcoming the sensations, the pictures, and the feelings that come into awareness.  Also allow yourself to feel any wanting that experience to be different, any wanting to change the past.  Could you also welcome any judgments about yourself or others and any wanting to figure out what to do about it now.  And then, could you allow everything that came into awareness to dance or spin together however it does?  And, could you welcome any wanting to hold on to that or push it away?  And any sense that it’s actually attached to you, that somehow it’s yours or defines you?  Then, just notice, that it isn’t really attached and you could just let it dissolve.  

Play Activity:

If asking is difficult for you, take a baby step by asking the grocery clerk for paper instead of plastic, or for your change in certain denominations (whether you care or not).  The more you get into the habit of asking for things, especially when you don’t care about the outcome, the easier it will become.  If you don’t have trouble with asking for little things, stretch yourself and ask for something that you’re pretty sure the answer will be no.  And then, give yourself a big pat on the back just for asking.



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Melanie Smithson Institute is dedicated to enriching lives through embodied education and training; using movement, play and releasing to connect with innate wisdom and joy.  

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